Love Conditioned
by Genkai-chan
Summary: Garcia has left the B.A.U and no one knows why. The only thing she can think to do now is the thing she loves, blogging. So the hacker passes time by telling her life story. Will she ever return to her family? D/P pairing. R n R.
1. Chapter 1

Genkai-chan: Hey guys. I'm still trying to dip my feet into the Criminal Minds fandom. I do love it, Reid is of course my favorite but for this story there will be Garcia/Morgan romance. This is actually from a CSI:Miami fanfiction I have going on, so far it's being well received and I want to know if I can make something good in this fandom as well. Please R and R and tell me what you think. Thanks. By the way, this is a frame story…meaning there is a story within a story. Penelope is going to be in the present writing about the past. Breaks will indicate her blogging which is in first person about the past events. Also note that as far as I am aware, we know little about Penelope's background, history and whatnot so do forgive me if I improvise and you disagree with it. It's the best I can do.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own this. Do not sue.

**Summary:** Something sparked the usual flirtatious woman to quit her job at the B.A.U. Even though her job was demanding and sometimes hard to handle, she loved it. Who knows what or who triggered her to leave? Was it a potential unsub or someone she knows personally? Was she threatened to leave or did she seriously left on her own accord? Dive into the mind of the one of the best hackers in the country and find out her side of the story. Penelope and Derek romance.

Love Conditioned

'I think the only thing I'll miss about the B.A.U is their super computers.' Penelope Garcia thought to herself as she was sitting in her own little home tucked away in the state of Virginia. She sighed and stared at her laptop, and figured it would do for now. Garcia had on pink pajamas and her hair had blue streaks in them, she liked to mix it up from time to time as anyone from the B.A.U could confirm that. The only thing that was constant in her life was her perky, upbeat, attitude. It was what got her through the many cases that crossed her eyes every day. The hacker was sitting at her desk, looking at her laptop, thinking about doing something but right now she was too mad to think straight.

Yesterday Penelope Garcia told Agent Hotchner that she was resigning from the position of Technician and would erase herself from the systems. At 8:00 pm the blond drove away from the Quantico Headquarters in her black car and headed back for her small apartment in the inner city.

And so that was the basic reason why Penelope Garcia was not at work on this sunny Monday morning.

She left.

'Well this bites; I should see what I can do now.' She thought which was obvious. Standing up, she walked into her kitchen area and started a frying pan to make something for breakfast but as she was doing it, she decided she wasn't in much of a state to handle cookware. Moving back into her room, she got dressed in a pink dress and a purple belt with black heeled shoes. Penelope then got her keys and got into her car, heading for someplace to eat. Arriving at a small diner a few blocks away she walked in and sat down alone. She ordered a cheese omelet and orange juice. In the back of her busy mind, she couldn't believe she just quit like that. Then again, she was provoked to do so and she did not want to get into it right now.

Soon enough her food arrived and she started to eat; her phone was in her purse but still on. And as she was about to take her first bite, the phone started to ring. Sighing, she sat there, pausing with her fork in midair, just listening to it. She wouldn't answer it. No. She just started to eat as the ring stopped. Garcia was in no mood to talk to anyone right now. The woman got up, paid her bill and left in about thirty minutes. When she got home, she looked at her phone and saw a voice mail and missed call from Aaron Hotchner. She sighed and set it aside. 'One day, I am gone one day and he already needs me. Seems he's the only one.' She thought.

It wasn't like her to get mad or angry but when you pushed her buttons for too long, she was liable to retaliate. Garcia seated herself at her desk and saw it was one o'clock. 'Well not much of the day has passed, I guess I should just surf the web.' She thought to herself and started typing away.

As she was trying to distract herself, she received an instant message from a friend who asked what was wrong since her status was: You're Outta Sight, Outta Mind.

Garcia then proceeded to explain as little as she could and her friend just advised her to blog about her feelings. Since Garcia did love to blog on Myspace and other sites, she decided she would do just that. The Tech would blog about her life at the B.A.U and why it was now the number one place on her Hate List. Yes it was childish, but she was not one to take nonsense sitting down. Never mind the fact that she spent most of her days at a desk.

Logging into her account, she paused, rethinking her idea. She knew that if she did blog about it, there was a slim chance that it could be found and if information was leaked, she would be in a lot of trouble. Instead she just opened a Word Document and started to think about how to start.

* * *

My name is Penelope Garcia and I am from Berkley, California. I have spent the past four and half years working for the F.B.I with a team of fabulous individuals. But first I will tell you about myself…

I am an only child, I was going to Caltech but dropped out, I then went underground and became a very skilled hacker. Soon I was caught and brought in, but instead of being dragged off to a dinky prison cell, I was asked to work for the B.A.U which stands for Behavioral Analysis Unit. I then moved to Quantico, Virginia where I lived and worked. I'm not much of a social person and I enjoy online games where interaction is through a computer screen. Don't judge me.

* * *

She paused and sighed, she still acted as if she was writing to an audience but it seemed easier then to be bland about it.

* * *

You want to know what annoys me? I work with these people who are like my family and somehow all of that can change within some silly little instant! It doesn't make any sense! I left the B.A.U yesterday and don't have a job to fall back on. I am sure I could always hack into one or easily find one that needs my talents but nothing would compare to being cooped up in my dark office, helping brave people catch criminals.

It wouldn't.

So now what am I supposed to do with myself? I really can't just go back. It's a long story.

* * *

Garcia looked at what she had written and sighed, it was exhausting to see it in writing now. She looked at the small clock in the corner of the screen and saw it was almost three, she didn't think time had passed that much, but she decided to write a little more and then take a nice cat nap.

* * *

I am just SOOO mad at him right now, I mean we go waaay back, and I honestly thought something was there. I may not be a profiler but I am not blind. We had something and maybe it wasn't good in the end. How would I know? At any rate, thinking about this is making me go from angry to sad. And I don't like being sad, so for now I am leaving.

Peace Out.

* * *

The woman got up and saved it and then laid on her bed, eyes staring at the wall as the birds flew around outside, 'Lucky them, they don't have to know where they're going, anything.' She thought. She closed her eyes and thought of a quote she had heard once from a poet named Henrik Ibsen. 'A forest bird never wants a cage.'

'Maybe I shouldn't be in a cage anymore, maybe I haven't found my calling…'

( I know it's short, but my first chapters usually are, just so I can gauge how many people are reading and reviewing. If you want me continue, please tell me and I will. I love getting motivation. Thanks guys. )


	2. Chapter 2

G-c: Glad to see a few people are interested, here is the second installment. I hope you enjoy and please review. I also never specified when this is taking place, it's around the beginning of the fifth season and it is also early spring.

**Pretenderfan:** Alright, thank you.

**PinkAngel17:** Thanks I hope you continue to read.

**Emzypemzy:** Thank you very much.

Disclaimer: See previous chapter.

Love Conditioned

It had been only three days since she left the BAU and since she started writing. Garcia still felt at a loss but she hoped it went away soon. 'Should I still be this upset over him?' She wondered as she was eating some cereal. She was looking for a job and had the newspaper out in front of her as she had her breakfast.

Back at Quantico, Hotch and Rossi were trying to figure out what had caused Garcia to up and leave. Derek didn't want to talk about it which drew suspicion to himself since he was the closest to the wild woman. "Say Derek, did you two fight or something?" Reid asked from across his desk as the team was working.

"No why do you ask?"

"Well it's kind of weird that you're taking all of this so well." Spencer said and glanced down at his work. "It's like you don't even care your friend is gone."

"Just drop it, ok? Derek said and got up from his chair and went to go get some more coffee, even though the genius probably saw it wasn't that empty. Spencer kept his mouth shut and went back to work. Though after some time, he sent an e mail to Penelope asking what was wrong.

Garcia was just finishing her captain crunch when she heard a 'ping' go off. She went to her laptop and saw Spencer sent her an e mail. She responded back saying she had felt the need to move onto to other things. She then decided to get dressed and go out. And after taking a nice walk she came back to her small apartment. She saw two messages on her answering machine and turned it on to listen to them.

"Hey Garcia, this is Spencer. I'm um just calling to talk to you if you're free. So um yeah, call m-call me back when you can. Okay bye."

She smiled a bit and erased it and the other message began.

"Hey Garcia, this is JJ. What am I saying? You know that. I bet you can also guess that I am calling to see what's up. We're all worried about you. Listen we have a case in San Francisco but you can call anytime you want. Please talk to me. This isn't like you. I hope we can talk to soon, ok? Bye."

Garcia sighed and looked off as she dropped her large purse down and just sat on the couch. 'If they're working on a case, I shouldn't bother them.' She thought and glanced over to her laptop. 'Maybe I should just write some more.' And with that she got up and sat down with her handy piece of technology and opened up a new document.

* * *

I need to start out from the beginning. When I was eighteen, my parents died in a car crash. I then went t live with my grandparents. They were real sweet: the typical kind that spoils you rotten. Unfortunately I became intrigued by computer sciences. And of course the older generation wasn't one to pick up on it easily so there was a gap between us over time. I went onto college as I said before and got into some hacking trouble. The BAU helped me out as long as I helped them.

Then I met Derek Morgan.

I recall one of the first cases I worked with him involved a bomber. I helped him recreate a pipe bomb and it was nice talking to someone who actually didn't mind me. I guess that's when I fell for him. I mean he's a total hunk. And someone who wouldn't give me a second look but we flirted and hit it off. At first I assumed he was just teasing.

But after a while we kept it up. It made my heart flutter.

Call me a sucker but I really did fall for him hard. I mean he's smart, charismatic, handsome, and just a giver. I know I stay optimistic but I just assumed I was something to amuse him. And it was fun flirting with him in the beginning but I guess I always had some worry in the back of my mind.

* * *

She bit her lip and reread what she was written. 'Wow my train of thought is everywhere.' She thought and got up and picked up her cell. She was very tempted to call JJ but then something hit her. She wasn't the tech for them anymore. She didn't want to think about Kevin taking her place. Did she think she wouldn't be replaced so soon? 'No they have to get someone in to help them. I'm just expendable.'

* * *

So I guess we both liked be fun and flirty and we didn't want to think how the other really felt. I mean I was sure he was joking and I didn't mind. I guess the attention he was giving me, was something I really enjoyed. Sure I had an alright childhood and growing up…but I never went out and actually dated. Someone like me isn't the type most guys look for.

They are looking for the thin cute girls that just do whatever a man tells them to right? I do my best to stay positive but I was just so damn sure Derek Morgan didn't think twice about me once he left for home every day. Well I'm hungry. Gtg-- go to go.

* * *

Garcia got up and set her laptop aside and went in to the kitchen to make her a grilled cheese for lunch. 'I bet the only job I could get right now is some lab job at best buy trying to help people program shitty things that are way above their intelligence level.' She thought with a frown as she buttered her bread. 'I guess I should talk to Hotch tonight.' She reasoned and just went along with her food perp. Her heart knew something was wrong but she didn't want to be the only one in sulk-mode.

( G-c: Sorry, that's all for now guys. Thanks for the support. I hope to hear more from you all. )


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